"I’m currently parenting a kid that isn’t super resilient. We’re working on it. It’s a slow process. Lately, if my kid hits a stumbling block - academic, athletic, playing games...you name it, it happens - he shuts down and retreats. It’s a bit maddening. (Pray for my patience y’all.)

It’s thrown me into thinking about what my mom did that helped me bounce back when things weren’t going my way. Early in my childhood she dug in and helped/made me follow through on commitments. Some that she made for me, some that I made for myself. There are few instances that stand out."

Last weekend my family headed up to Lubbock for my brother’s graduation from Texas Tech. Because we are scattered across different parts of DFW and all had different obligations that caused us to all have to arrive and leave at different times we ended all driving separately and all bringing our dogs for the weekend.

My dog and my parents’ dog are about as low maintenance as they come. But that’s not the case when it comes to my sisters 1-year old mini schnauzer named Chester. Chester needs attention constantly and always seems to have a problem with something.

You may have noticed this recent headline. It seems a substantial crack formed on a major I-40 bridge crossing the Mississippi River between Tennessee and Arkansas. The sole purpose of this bridge is to safely move vehicular traffic from one side of the river to the other side.

As I read about this, I began to think about our lives. Are we due a routine inspection? What might we find that we too have a few cracks in our foundation that need to be repaired and reinforced.

“During this last semester of seminary, I have never been more thankful in my life that the God we worship is full of love and overflowing with grace. The content of the classes I was studying was wildly fascinating and informative, but each class demanded more from me than I had to give. I spent much of the semester feeling like I wasn’t enough. There were days when I felt like I wasn’t qualified to be a pastor because I couldn’t seem to be as prepared for class as I wanted to be, or when I did feel adequately prepared for class it meant that my house was an absolute mess or that my dogs hadn’t received as much of my attention as they deserve.”

Last Sunday Arborlawn UMC launched our latest sermon series entitled, "Photo Op." I am very excited about this series because I love pictures, and I love the story photographs can tell. A few years ago, I posted one of my senior pictures on facebook and was quite surprised by the response. I graduated from Western Hills High School here in Fort Worth in 1993. Back in the olden days, the school told you what company to go to the summer before your junior year to have your senior picture made. (This is quite different from today's practices in which our seniors have personalized photo shoots and look like models.)

Jireh - do you know what it means?

I didn’t until I listened to a worship song called “Jireh.” The song was good and catchy and I liked the lyrics! Except I didn’t really know what “Jireh” meant. The chorus rings out “Ji-reh, you are enough.” I answer my questions like most people these days, and I typed it into google to find the answer. I learned Jehovah-Jireh is a name for God. And it’s actually one of the most popular names used for God. Which I found funny because I can’t remember reading it in scripture. Where is it used and what does it mean?

When there is silence in our house, which is rare, I oftentimes will look at the pictures on our wall. The family pictures, the obligatory newborn pictures of our boys and a handful of cute and funny candid shots we have managed to take over the years. I am proud of all of them and that we were so fortunate to capture so many of these moments in our lives.

I'm pretty excited about this Sunday. For the first time in over a year, we'll have some Sunday School Classes back on campus! While I'm undeniably excited, there's quite a puzzle to put together between sprinkler flooding, construction, and COVID safety measures. Where can the classes meet? How often? What are the class wants/needs? Even with utilizing outdoor areas, we'll still have to rotate classes on campus during the Sunday School hour. One of the strengths of our church is our Sunday School hour. There are many long standing classes, each with their own DNA and preferences.

Each year, during Holy Week, I spend a lot of time thinking about sacrifice. Not just the sacrifice of God's only son, but also the sacrifices that my family made for me. I was extremely close to my maternal grandparents, who were incredibly faithful. Their faith, and what it instilled in our family, built the foundation of who and where I am today.

I help run a non- profit organization that raises money for law enforcement officers in the DFW area that are killed or seriously injured. Our last fundraiser was for a Mansfield officer that was struck by a car while riding his motorcycle on his way to work. The officer was care flighted to the hospital and taken straight into surgery. When he came out of surgery, he learned they had to amputate his leg.

My mom will sometimes talk about how I wanted to be a good helper when I was a toddler. I would see her cooking in the kitchen and want to get involved. Following her around as she collected items to make our meal, I would close doors to the pantry, cabinet and refrigerator that she had carelessly left open. That seemed pretty helpful! Only as it turns out, she wasn’t careless. She just wasn’t done with that door yet and needed something else from behind it. I thought I knew what was best, but in my helping I created more work for my mom. Luckily I was still pretty cute back then and kept letting me help. Maybe you have young ones in your life who have really “helped” you with your projects as well.

I recently heard a quote by a well-respected United Methodist pastor that I found both beautiful and convicting. This pastor was well-known for saying the following to members of his congregation whenever someone would approach him about a ministry or mission idea:

“God didn’t wake you up in the middle of the night to burden me with that ministry.”

“At a wedding shower held at my first pastoral appointment at Granbury FUMC, Carol Davis gifted Joel and myself a gorgeous cream on cream king-sized hand stitched quilt. It lived on our bed for many years until we bought our RV. Because Carol and her husband were RVers, I knew she would approve of the move to our home on wheels.”

“Christmas came this year despite the Grinch’s best efforts to stop it because even a pandemic can’t overshadow God’s divine entrance into our broken, human world. The Whos would know exactly what to do today - they would sing - and we should follow suit. With or without a big meal or presents, regardless of the amount of decorations you put up, whether you gathered with family or chose to stay distanced, I pray that today will be filled with praise and thanksgiving to God. The Christchild is born, bringing hope, peace, love, and joy with him, and shining his light into the darkness of 2020. Nothing and no one, not even the Grinch of 2020, can remove the Light of the World from within you. Merry Christmas, dear one - sing on!”

“One early morning during the Advent season of 2019, I heard the familiar steps of my youngest son skip-running towards my bed. I lifted up the covers and he crawled in beside me. I buried my nose in his dirty hair-we had been on Christmas break for several days, and I’m not really sure when he had last bathed-but it smelled distinctly of little boy, and karate, and sweat, and sleep.”

One of the things I find most annoying about my relationship with God is the method of communication God uses. As many times as I have begged for a flashing neon sign or shouts through a megaphone to give me directions - and trust me, I’ve begged - God has never once used either of those things to guide me. No no, God prefers a little whisper or a gentle tug on my heart strings, both of which are much more difficult to notice in the midst of the chaos of everyday life. Doesn’t God know how busy I am? Doesn’t God know how much quicker I would be to respond if the messages were a little more grandiose?

If you have 20/20 vision, congratulations! You have avoided the pain of an eyelash sticking to your contact and scraping against your eyelid (or really any foreign object fighting your contact); it doesn’t feel awesome… You have also avoided the conundrum of wearing glasses with a mask, where you have to decide which is worse: fogging over the glasses with every exhale, or being out of breath from trying to breathe shallowly enough so as not to fog over the glasses, and you can forget about trying to speak a syllable without fogging up completely.

How is it with your soul today, dear friend?

Still full from Thanksgiving dinner? Weary from the pandemic that may have kept you from gathering with your loved ones? Anxious about what Christmas will look like this year? Wondering how this Christmas season will bring the hope, joy, love, and peace that we always expect this time of year?

Me too… and with a deep breath I ask again, how is it with your soul?

Have you read Zechariah? I knew I had cause in seminary I’ve had to read all of scripture. In seminary you are reading so much of it, so quickly, only big major things really stick in your memory. A couple of weeks ago, I felt yet another conviction in my life to be more intentional with my quiet times - thanks to Christie Robbins and my friend Mallorie. Weirdly enough, I settled on reading Zechariah not really knowing what it was about.

I laughed as I read the first title “A Call to return to the Lord.” I thought, “Ok Jesus, I see you. I know you’re calling me.”

A few months ago, I had to take some time off from working at my new job as the Associate Pastor of Congregational Care here at Arborlawn in order to focus on my health. I was also on some medication that caused me to dream wildly and vividly, something I do not normally experience on a regular basis.