So let us not grow weary in doing what is right, for we will reap at harvest time, if we do not give up.
- Galatians 6:9
Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight and the sin that clings so closely, and let us run with perseverance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus the pioneer and perfecter of our faith, who for the sake of the joy that was set before him endured the cross, disregarding its shame, and has taken his seat at the right hand of the throne of God.
Now, discipline always seems painful rather than pleasant at the time, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.
- Hebrews 12:1-2, 11
I’m currently parenting a kid that isn’t super resilient. We’re working on it. It’s a slow process. Lately, if my kid hits a stumbling block - academic, athletic, playing games...you name it, it happens - he shuts down and retreats. It’s a bit maddening. (Pray for my patience y’all.)
It’s thrown me into thinking about what my mom did that helped me bounce back when things weren’t going my way. Early in my childhood she dug in and helped/made me follow through on commitments. Some that she made for me, some that I made for myself. There are few instances that stand out.
School - I was a math whiz growing up...until I wasn’t. Trig took me down. Hard. I was in a class where the teacher wanted problems worked her way and my brain couldn’t catch it. My brain worked through the problem slightly different, and I got the right answer 90% of the time. Which was good enough for me. It wasn’t, however, good enough for the teacher. All the work I did was marked wrong because I didn’t follow her steps - unless it was a scantron test. I could nail the tests where work wasn’t required. It was the first class I’d ever been in danger of failing, and it was so defeating to do the work and still get it all marked wrong. I begged my mom to get me put into another class. There were so many nights full of tears and desperation. She said no, stood firm. She made me take responsibility and work through it, and at semester allowed me to finally move classes. I had the power to make it better. I failed that class (there’s more to the story), but I can look back now and know it was the right move for her as a parent.
Sports - I loved softball. One season I was struggling, wasn’t as good as the rest of the team. It was not a great feeling. All I wanted to do was quit. I wasn’t playing much at all anyway. She made me finish out the season. Again, loads of teenage angst and fights, but she stayed the course.
Church - She committed our family to church every Sunday we were in town. When I got to youth age, I could choose - Sunday School or Youth (church was non-negotiable). If I didn’t go to Sunday School, she drove me to youth whether I wanted to go or not. Teen angst and fights - again. In the end, this helped me understand the routine of church, the importance of a church community, and the necessity of keeping Jesus close.
Long term, I’m incredibly thankful that my mom didn’t clear the path for me. She made me work through hard times. She taught me to stay in the uncomfortable times. She let me fall, let me fail - so that I could learn what it took to pick myself back up and try again. There were powerful lessons in each of these childhood moments. No one promises that life will be easy, and we have to learn to manage the hard stuff in life. It’s my hope and prayer that I’m able to instill in my kid what my mom instilled in me.
This past Sunday I ran over my (very expensive) phone. Yes. Ran over my phone. It actually works...but is totally busted. But it didn’t ruin my day. I came to church with a smile on my face, hoping to help people meet Jesus. And then I went home and figured out what I needed to do to fix the problem.
Parenting is a labor of love. I imagine it’s a bit like God loving us. Watching us make mistakes, and loving us through them. Helping us sit in the discomfort and learning to regroup to move forward.
Written By: Abby Johnson