I belong to a FB support group for parents who have lost children to cancer. Last night, a broken hearted Momma introduced herself to the group and asked for advice about a few things as her young child's battle with cancer is coming to a close and Hospice care is beginning.
One thing she asked about was if she should tell her child that they were dying. Of the many things that parents who have not lost a child "can't imagine," this decision is especially brutal. It is a question and decision that haunts every parent who has walked this horrifying path. There is no right or wrong answer and everyone that responded gave her sincere and heartfelt advice. She will do wLife hat is right for her child and her family. It will be extraordinarily difficult, but she will find unwavering support in this same group of people who offered a diverse range of views and opinions. Every parent in this group has suffered the devastating loss of their child to cancer. Childhood cancer does not discriminate based on race, religion, socio-economic status or politics. Cancer is an equal opportunity monster and force of destruction. We are from diverse backgrounds, and I feel quite certain we are not a homogeneous group outside of our common bond of child loss, but that is a very strong bond. I think of these Mommas as I watch the hatred and ridiculousness that seems to be coming to an especially ugly head as election day nears.
I have strong opinions about who I support in this election and the current state of affairs in this country. I try not to share those opinions on FB but if you dig a little into my posts, you can figure it out. I realize much is at stake for both sides as our country decides what direction to take. It breaks my heart to see so many invest so much emotional energy in promoting the idea that life as we know it ends abruptly if the "wrong" candidate wins- both sides are guilty of promoting this hysteria and both sides benefit from it.
Life as you know it can end abruptly in an instant and in many different ways, but I assure you that an American presidential election will never be the immediate cause.
When life as you know it does come to a screeching halt, you realize that the very most important things in the world have absolutely nothing to do with who sits in the oval office or who has the majority in the house or senate. These things are most certainly important for the long term, but each of us has our own small, close network of family and friends that have far more of an immediate and significant impact on our life. I am pretty sure the Momma who is struggling today to decide if and how to tell her child they are dying, feels very little passion or enthusiasm about either presidential candidate or political party. Her focus and priority is her child and her family. She will likely never look at the world the same way again as a result of this experience. Your perspective and priorities can change drastically when your soul has been completely crushed and then you are forced to jump back onto the crazy train of "normal" life.
So, enthusiastically support your candidates and work for change you believe in, but remember that no matter who "wins" the election, you will wake up that next morning and you will still be surrounded by and in possession of the most important gifts this life has to offer.
Written By: Cathy Lin
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