I am hopelessly obsessed with the TV show Ted Lasso, probably to the point that my friends, family, and co-workers are annoyed with me. By Friday afternoon I am texting people to ask if they have watched the newest episode yet so that we can talk about it.
The premise of the show is pretty simple. An American college football coach gets hired to coach an English Premier League football (soccer) team in West London. Ted Lasso is a mustachioed Midwesterner who doesn’t know the first thing about British football or culture and is suddenly thrust into the middle of both. Heartwarming moments and hilarity ensue. For all of the cross-cultural humor and sports references, its really the idea of defying expectations that defines the show. With Ted, there is always more than meets the eye, and he is constantly causing others to rethink the assumptions they have made about him.
One such moment occurs in the local pub when Ted makes a friendly wager over a game of darts in an effort to defend his friend. Ted wins the game and shocks the bystanders. But he also shares a story about driving past a sign emblazoned with the Walt Whitman quote “Be curious, not judgmental” and the impact it had on him. That quote has been on my mind lately because it embodies what I want our Student Ministry to look like.
I met with our small group leaders a few nights ago to prepare for this upcoming school year and encouraged them to get personal with their students this year. We want our ministry, and especially our small groups, to be a safe place where students are fully seen and known. A place where students are being invested in by leaders who are curious, not judgmental. We have those leaders and I cannot wait to see what they do this year with students.
But that quote also makes me think of Jesus. It makes me laugh sometimes to think of all the questions Jesus asks in scripture that he clearly knows the answer to already. Jesus didn’t need to hear the answer, but he asked the question anyway. Curiosity is what allows us to form and strengthen relationships. I think curiosity can be as much about asking the question as receiving the answer. If we want to love people the way Jesus did I think curiosity is a great place to start.
The last thing I told our small group leaders was this – You have permission to get personal. I hope that we will all do that. That we will step in to spaces where people are hurting, lonely, or just need encouragement and love them like Jesus did. And that as we do we will be curious, not judgmental.
Written By: Jason Ivie